Cleaning your teeth is one of the easiest and best things you can do for yourself to improve your over all health. Most everyone thinks they know how to clean teeth properly. However, most people don’t brush their teeth long enough, often enough, or thoroughly enough. Aside from just brushing, there’s a lot more you should know about how to clean teeth such as proper flossing methods, mouthwashes, oral irrigation systems, the list goes on. My grandpa always told me “Take good care of your chompers, you don’t want to end up like your grandma.” Grandma wears dentures. So, if you want to avoid having to take your teeth out so you can clean them, read my latest article on how to clean your teeth.
Although things are going a lot more smoothly for my face these days, I’ve been trying to figure out how to clean pores for about fifteen years now. Clogged pores first became a real problem for me when I was in the seventh and eight grades during football season. It’s a damn good thing I sucked at football, because that friggin’ chin strap did amazingly horrible things to my chin. I think, because of my large pores, it was worse for me than for most. Luckily my padre had the same issues with clogged pores when he has a kid and was able to give me some good advice on cleaning pores. These days, even though I’m too old and fat to play football, I still have to deal with blocked pores. My biggest problem is with my nose pores. There have been times when my nose has looked like the back of a Surinam toad. If you don’t know what that is…look it up. Luckily, through trial and error, I’ve learned how to clean nose pores as well as any other clogged pores. If you would like some advice on how to clean pores, check out this article.
Mirror cleaning is grossly underrated. Mirrors remind us to comb our hair, cast out nose goblins, and put on pants. They tell us when we’re looking smoking hot and when we need to donate an unflattering, snug blouse. Though often too late, mirrors warn about the axe murderer standing behind us. Mirrors can make small rooms larger - and sometimes creepier. We take our mirrors for granted and allow them to become dirty with our paw prints, our snot blasts, and our generally filthy nature. This can’t go on. Today, you will make a solemn pledge to clean mirrors on a regular basis. Cleaning mirrors will become your passion and your life’s meaning. Your clean mirrors will reflect with such penetrating flawlessness, guests will look into them and become self-actualized. Yes, I will teach you these dark arts. Follow any of the links to learn how to clean mirrors using effective, environmentally friendly methods.
When I was little, my mother doted on me. One good-intentioned, loving thing she did was clean my ears. She would call me over to sit on her lap while she slammed Q-tips through my eardrum and into my temporal lobe. So what if I lost the ability to recognize speech and button my pants? I had clean ears. Today doctors admonish us (too late for some) not to put anything smaller than our elbows into the ear. If that didn’t leave you disillusioned, this will: Ear wax, one of the nastiest bodily emissions, is good for us. It waterproofs, protects, and lubricates ears. Ironically, one of its main functions is ear cleaning. That’s impressive, but in excess, ear wax can lead to hearing loss, itchiness, pain, tinnitus, and loneliness. So ear wax does serve a purpose, but you can get rid of it if you’re experiencing symptoms. In my latest article, I demonstrate how to clean your ears using methods your doctor (and temporal lobe) would approve.
In the future, we’ll delegate all floor cleaning projects to a robotic slave class. But until the future envisioned in the flop “I, Robot” comes to pass, humans will have to clean floors. I have several floor types in my home. I clean wood floors, bamboo floors, linoleum, carpeting…etc. I intend to have diamond-encrusted platinum floors installed at some point. Though we don’t yet have an article on how to clean floors made of precious metals and rare stones, our library is growing. Right now our site demonstrates how to clean several of the most common floor types using inexpensive, environmentally friendly tactics. We will generate new articles based on reader suggestions, so go ahead and make requests. Follow a link to learn how to clean floors in all their wonderful varieties.
Keyboard cleaning is a task I usually put off until newly evolved lifeforms begin emerging from beneath the keys. “It’s my computer,” I reason. “I’m the only person who has to touch it.” But inevitably a friend will come over, ask to use my computer, and barely swallow their vomit in time. Thus, I am forced to clean my keyboard. Perhaps you are in the same boat. No worries. Keyboard cleaning is easy, though it is time consuming. The method I use is cheap and it won’t damage your keyboard or tarnish the key markings. Oh, and your new clean keyboard will be the talk of the blogosphere. The one drawback is, once you decide to clean your keyboard, you won’t be able to use it for a few hours. No computer? No Facebook? No blogging? You may need a heavy sedative or some street drugs to get through this harrowing ordeal. Learn how to score smack and other useful tidbits in my newest article on how to clean a keyboard.
Kids today are not being taught how to clean fish or any other fresh game. Never in human history have people been so far removed from the food they consume. Where does it come from? What (or who) is in it? Who catches and prepares it? With eyes glazed over and mouths stuffed with chicken nuggets, these are questions we choose to ignore. Well, what are you going to do when the zombie apocalypse finally happens? What would you do if Wal-Mart and McDonalds were to close? You would be hunting, fishing, and cannibalizing the neighbors to stay alive. Your survival education begins with cleaning fish. While not as calorie intensive as your neighbors, fish are a great source of protein with myriad health benefits. Cleaning fish well takes practice, but it isn’t complicated. I demonstrate how to clean fish with a fillet knife and a cutting board. That is all you need. You’ll find much more on the page, including ways to store and prepare fish. Follow a link to read my latest article.
My initial inspiration for wanting to write an article on how to clean chrome came from my father. Dad drives a Harley. With a Harley, comes chrome. With chrome comes dirt. And as with any Harley rider, my old man treats that bike with more love, adoration, and respect than anything else in his life (sorry to break it to you Ma). And so, cleaning chrome is something that is near and dear to his heart. So after thinking about his suggestion for awhile, I began to look around. Chrome is everywhere. Not just on motorcycles. I’ve got chrome faucets, my brother has chrome rims, the handle on my oven door is even chrome plated. Chrome is just a great way to liven up every day things. That is, until, it gets dirty. So, with that in mind, I set out to learn how to clean chrome steel. Turns out, chrome cleaning can be very, very easy. But you do have to be careful. Improper chrome care and chrome polishing can seriously damage the stuff. So, without further ado, I present you with: How to Clean Chrome.
I am the world’s giantest sissy when it comes to cleaning vomit. This is of special concern to my fiancè since she is hoping to one day have kids. I admit, it scares me. It won’t be easy for me to clean up baby, and some day, kid vomit. I’ve had to deal with enough of that from my nephews. Aside from their vomit, I’ve also been dealing with cleaning dog vomit and cat vomit since I was a little tyke. One would think I would have gotten over my disgust by now. Not a chance. I have however gotten very good at cleaning vomit fairly quickly and efficiently. The faster I get it done, the happier I am. I’m especially happy if I do a good job of cleaning up vomit. I want no trace of the stuff left behind. That being said, I put together this article in hopes of helping other people out there who are as revolted by vomit as I am. I’m not saying there’s no ish-factor to my method of cleaning vomit, but it works well and you’ll be satisfied with the results. Check out my article on how to clean vomit.
