How to Clean a Penis

My name is Adam, and I have a penis. It's true. I've had one my whole life. It's funny how simply talking about genitalia, even in clinical terms, is a major taboo in the United States. It remains the domain of perverts and stand-up comedians. In most other countries, sex and sexual accoutrement is less offensive than images of violence and death, but here we've got it bassackwards.

A little less than half the world's population has a penis. And those penises need to be cleaned. It may be a point of embarrassment for some men to be reading this article, but you'd be surprised how many men, regardless of age, do not know how to properly clean their genitalia. Nor do they know why it's important. So if you're unsure, or just curious, read on.

Step-by-Step Penis Cleaning Instructions

Terminology. Don't be offended, some people just don't know. I intend to cover the areas we'll be dealing with in the article. Further study can be made in anatomy classes.

Circumcised/Uncircumcised: Whether or not you have had your foreskin removed. Circumcised indicates that you have; uncircumcised indicates that you have not.

Foreskin: The flap of skin that covers the tip of the penis. Generally, it can be pulled back away from the tip.

Glans: The tip, or "head," of the penis.

Penis: The shaft leading to the body, as well as the entire works.

Scrotum: The loose flesh that houses the testicles.

Testicles: The hanging "balls" below the penis.

Cleaning the glans. For uncircumcised men, pull the foreskin away from the head of your penis as far as you can without hurting yourself. Using a soft washcloth and a mixture of soap and water, gently scrub this area. It should not be painful. If it is, you're either scrubbing too hard or the area is trying to become infected. It's important to clean this area well. If not, a substance called, and I kid you not, smegma (a combination of dead skin cells, oils, dirt, and bacteria) can build up and cause both unpleasant odor and infection. For circumcised men, simply wash thoroughly with soap and water. In both cases, avoid getting soap in your urethra (the hole at the tip of your penis from which you expel urine) because it stings like crazy.

Wash the shaft. Not much to it here, though thoroughness is necessary. Once again, soap and water will do the trick. However, this is an area where your skin can dry out and start to flake. Once you've washed and dried, apply some skin lotion to this area to keep the skin smooth and flake-free.

Clean the base of the penis. Again, use a washcloth with soap and water. Since this is an area that's kept under wraps most of the day, sweat, skin oils, and bacteria can build up. If not cleaned properly, it can cause an intense, unpleasant odor. Lift the shaft up and clean this area thoroughly. If you have an abundance of pubic hair, trimming or shaving can help cut down on the odor and make the area easier to clean. Take care with razors, though: Spurting blood from your genitalia is not a conversation you want to have with friends and family.

Clean the testicles. This is another area that can accumulate sweat and bacteria quickly, and can cause an even more intense, unpleasant odor. Clean your scrotum thoroughly, on all sides. Pay special attention to the perineum, which is the patch of skin between the base of your scrotum and your rectum. This often goes neglected, and as it is such a tight space, it can develop an aroma fairly quickly.

How often should I clean my penis? Simple answer: Every time you shower or bathe. Long answer: The penis, I think we can all agree, is an extremely sensitive area. There are thousands of nerve endings in this region, and very delicate skin. Infections suck no matter where they occur on your body, but it's a thousand times worse when it's on your genitals. Like it or not, unless there's something wrong, you use your penis every day. I have showered once daily since I was 13 years old, and I clean my penis every time. I am happy to report that, to date, I have never had an infection in that region (knock on wood).

Penis Cleaning:It Isn't Hard

It isn't hard to keep your penis clean. It takes less than a minute to go through the steps I've mentioned here, and the benefits of a clean, healthy penis are evident. But I list them anyway just to make you all the more uncomfortable:

  1. Avoid infection. Infections suck. Infections on the penis are worse.
  2. Avoid smell. The penis region emits a distinctive odor when it's dirty. I don't care how much cologne, deodorant, or clothing you layer on, it doesn't go away. It can't be masked. Every guy in the joint knows exactly what that combination of smells entails. And they are judging you.
  3. A clean penis increases your likelihood of having intercourse. It's true. Your potential partner won't run in terror at the sight (or smell) of your penis if all is well. Of course, cleaning the rest of you helps, too.